It may seem plausible to wonder, can an empath be a narcissist. However, once you delve into what truly makes up an empath and then what constitutes a narcissist, the answer becomes very clear.
In short, no a true empath cannot be a narcissist. Those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) do not have the ability to feel genuine empathy and compassion, whereas empaths feel both of those things at higher-than-average levels.
But, it goes deeper than that. Let’s explore the question, can an empath be a narcissist?
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Who is the Empath?
Empaths are people who are born with the innate ability to feel the emotions of other people as if those emotions were their own.
Highly sensitive empaths have the added layer of a hypersensitive nervous system, enabling them to feel the pain of others within their own bodies as if it were their own pain.
Due to the empath’s high levels of empathy, they are able to feel huge amounts of compassion for others. They can see through the exterior masks that people wear to hide what’s really going on inside.
Empaths want to alleviate the pain of others, which results in them being over-givers, always trying to ‘fix’ other people. This is particularly prevalent in unaware empaths (i.e. the ones who don’t realise they are empaths).
What’s really happening is that the empath cannot bear to feel all of these things, most of which aren’t even theirs. So, the only way they know how to make themselves feel better is to help those around them. In other words, when everyone around them is feeling good, the empath is able to feel okay again themselves.
Empaths have higher levels of empathy than the average person and tend to be over-givers.
Who is the Narcissist?
The narcissist was not born as such but created through some form of early trauma in their childhood. It could have been neglect, physical abuse, a traumatic event or even over-spoiling, causing them to have an unhealthily aggrandised view of themselves.
Whatever it was left the child with such deep feelings of shame, disgust and unworthiness that they simply could not cope with it.
As a response to their trauma, they subconsciously chose to cut off their True Self, the part of them that was responsible for them having to feel all of their inner wounding. In essence, they needed to completely disown their trauma in order to survive.
When they amputated their True Self, they also severed their access to the divine life force energy, which is what allows humans to feel the full spectrum of love, empathy, compassion and kindness.
The narcissist was left as a conscienceless soul.
In place of where their True Self lived now sits an empty black hole. What the narcissist didn’t account for was that this black hole would cause them even greater feelings of self-loathing without having anything authentic left inside of them.
For the narcissist to get ahead in the world, their ego needed to take over. There is nothing tangible or genuine about the ego and it knows that for its very survival, it needs to protect the narcissist from their own inner truth at all costs.
In other words, it needs to hide the narcissist from the truth that they are a flawed and defective human being, just like everyone else.
In order to do this, the ego created a False Self, tricking the narcissist into believing that their False Self is truly who they are.
The narcissist’s False Self is a “perfect, superior God.” To go with this new delusional view of themselves, the ego constructed an entire fantasy world for them to live in. In the narcissist’s fantasy, they are the centre of all things, with all other characters being mere tools for them to use for personal gain.
However, since the narcissist’s fantasy is nothing but a figment of their imagination, the only way for it to continuously stay real for them is by getting constant feedback from the world around them that it’s true.
This is where narcissistic supply comes in, which is their constant need for attention, validation and adulation. This can be in the form of people praising and adoring them, or even reacting to the narcissist’s abuse and trying to appeal to their conscience (which they severed a long time ago).
Either way, receiving direct attention validates the narcissist’s fantasy that they are important, special and powerful.
Narcissistic supply serves two purposes:
- It reinforces the narcissist’s delusion of power, superiority and uniqueness
- It feeds life force energy into their empty black hole, stopping them from falling into their own darkness
|READ: Narcissistic Supply Explained →
Of course, no sane person is going allow their precious life force to be siphoned out by an energy vampire. The narcissist must use manipulation, coercion and trickery to get people to willingly hand it over. This is why they will wear all sorts of seemingly innocent masks to achieve this.
For the psychological survival of the narcissist, their fantasy reality must be continuously inflated. Without the constant validation from the outside world that their delusion is ‘real,’ it will quickly dissipate and they will be left to fall into their inner black hole. That is a fate worse than death to the narcissist, which is why they must protect their false reality to the death.
Narcissists have no conscience (i.e. no empathy or compassion) and are predatory over-takers.
Can an Empath Be a Narcissist?
In summary, empaths exude higher than average levels of empathy and compassion, making them over-givers, wanting to help and heal those around them.
On the other hand, narcissists have no conscience and cannot experience authentic love, empathy or compassion. They view other people as tools for them gain resources and achieve goals, rather than being individual beings with their own needs, wants and desires. Narcissists are predatory by nature and are over-takers.
The stark difference between an empath and a narcissist could not sit any further apart on the spectrum.
No, it’s not possible for an empath to be a narcissist. Empaths have such high levels of empathy and compassion, while narcissists have none (although they are adept at faking them as a form of manipulation).
To be clear, I am addressing those who have Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) in this article, not those who simply exhibit narcissistic behaviours, but without having the actual disorder.
Empaths, just like all other humans, can behave narcissistically (in an overly self-serving manner), but that does not make them a narcissist. It just means they’ve got some work to do with self-awareness and personal growth.
True NPD is where the person has unconsciously severed their connection to source via amputating their True Self. It is a full psychological soul split.
Empaths are still very much fully intact with a very strong connection to source and their True Self.
|READ: Are Narcs Afraid of Empaths? →
▶️ VIDEO: Can Empaths Be Narcissists?
What the Narcissist Teaches the Empath
The biggest lesson all empaths need to learn is that it’s not their job to fix or heal everyone else. The gift of having high levels of empathy and compassion has its place and can be used for good, but not at the expense of themselves.
It’s not uncommon for empaths to go through multiple narcissistic relationships throughout their lives, whether they be with friends, family, work colleagues or romantic partners.
The universe sets these situations up to show the empath the dangers of handing their power over to entities outside of themselves. They must learn to trust their own intuition and guidance instead of taking on the perceptions of others.
Empaths fundamentally believe that everyone is genuinely good at heart and that love and compassion can heal anything. However, the truth is that there are many different beings and entities on this planet and not all of them are from the light.
The empath needs to learn to protect their energy and be selective about whom they lend their empathy and compassion to.
The more malevolent entities, who are functioning from lower vibrations, are completely self-serving and not operating for the greater good like the empath is. They will use and abuse the empath, siphon out their life force energy, kick them to the kerb and then move on to their next victim without a backward glance.
Narcissists are masterful con artists, easily tricking the empath into handing over their life force energy through FOG (Fear, Obligation and Guilt). They know that the empath cannot stand to feel others in pain or be left in a state of anxiety, so the empath will do whatever it takes to relieve those feelings.
The narcissist will weaponise and use the empath’s compassion against them every, single time.
Narcissists do not have a conscience, therefore they will always operate with predatory behaviour. They cannot be healed or fixed because their True Self was killed off to the point of no resuscitation. Without their True Self, they are nothing but an empty black hole, sucking out the life force energy from others, which can only ever alleviate their emptiness, but never actually fill it.
Once the empath finally learns that they are sacrificing themselves for an empty void, they can begin to heal their own inner wounding. They learn that they must stop looking outward for validation and approval and step into becoming their own source of unconditional love.
The real lesson for the empath is in pulling all of their energy back from the outside world and healing themselves, rather than trying to fix everybody else. From there, they begin to rise above the lower, deceitful energies into a place of such strength and high self-worth that they are now able to see clearly who is deserving of their compassion and who is not.
Once the empath is fully healed, never again will the manipulations of any narcissist work on them.
|READ: Spiritual Awakening & Narcissism →
▶️ VIDEO: What Empaths Learn from Narcissists
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